By Lindsey Holder
Thursday, Dec 16 2010

Hi, there! You may not recognize me, but I’m the girl from the concert the other night. You know, the one you shoved out of the way to get to the front. The one you spilled your drink on. The one who gave you the evil eye as you talked the whole time (even during the quiet songs). Does that ring a bell? I hope so!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the show, but I’m not sure you remember, it because you were so obviously wasted, dancing up a storm and bumping into everyone around you. I’m sure your night was great, but I wanted to let you know that the people around you didn’t think your singing at the top of your lungs was quite as amazing as you did. So since you may not have noticed me or the other people around you seething at your behavior, I’m going to do you a solid and give you some pointers for the next time you go to a show. After all, I’d hate to see you get punched in the face.

Actually, come to think of it, I wouldn’t mind that at all, since I’m still trying to get your Jack and Coke out of my latest Zappos purchase. Still, let’s try to have cooler heads prevail.

As the new year inches ever closer, it’s time to look back on the past 12 months, atone for our blunders and bad behavior, and think about what we can do in the next 12 to be better people, help the world around us, and sooth the soul of our fellow man. Because this is the music section of New Times, our suggestions for New Year’s resolutions are kind of limited to, ummm, music. Don’t worry, there’s plenty of room to improve in every area of one’s life, so as a service to our readers, we’re providing a list of concert-going behavior we should all strive to avoid in order to become a kinder, gentler audience in 2011. Think of it as Emily Post’s rules of etiquette for rock shows and consider it an early Christmas present from the folks who go to concerts for a living.
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